Belinda and Julie share self-defense tips for women

When Carrie Donovan of Roseville first saw her accommodations in Mexico, she thought she had entered paradise.

"Just hear the waves, which is just such a peaceful sound, and the house is beautiful," said Donovan.

What a trip it promised to be - just Carrie and a girlfriend, enjoying the sun and surf. But on the second night, things took a sharp turn.

"I woke up at 3 a.m. in the morning," Donovan remembered, "and I see a man walk by the pool, which is right next to the house. I think it's the security guard checking on the house, making sure we're safe. The next thing I knew he was in our house."

The man put a machete to Donovan's throat and dragged her to a nearby couch.

"When you're in that situation you feel like you're in a movie. This is not really happening to me. It really didn't...I don't know what I am supposed to do...but in this situation I thought of my husband who told me to be safe and then I thought of Al, and I knew I had to do something," said Donovan.

Al Horner is a former Navy Seal who just weeks before had trained Donovan and some of her female colleagues in self-defense.

As she lay on the couch with a knife to her neck, she thought of him telling her not to be a victim. She grabbed the machete.

"I swear when I grabbed that thing I felt like I bent it. I got to do what I had to do and he left," Donovan explained.

The damage to Donovan's hand was extensive, but she believes Horner's lessons saved her from something far worse.

We wanted to share some of those lessons with you, so we brought a group of women together with that purpose in mind.

"So this is Al, and he's just written about self-defense, and we're lucky to have him for a fun Friday night get together," said Jean Anselmo of Edina.

"What my objective is tonight, is to help you be safer," said Horner.

Horner's main message is to avoid being in a threatening situation in the first place.

"We teach avoid, avoid, avoid. We don't use anything physical until all of those things have failed and they guy is about to physically assault you."

You can avoid dangerous situations by listening to what Horner calls, your "threat alarm."

"It's that unsettled feeling right in here," he said, pointing to his chest. "Honor it, get separation from whatever caused it, and then figure out what you are going to do. But first listen to it, don't over think it. A mind is a terrible thing to use when the threat alarm is going off."

It's important to keep in mind that 80 percent of assaults are committed by someone the victim knows.

"So if you're at a party with me and I'm getting too close, or I'm looking at you wrong, or anything is happening that causes your threat alarm to go off, you should have one and only one reaction, that is get physical separation from me," he cautioned.

But what if you simply can't get away, what if it's too late? What if you are trapped? Horner teaches women to take all that fear and anger and put it into their hands and use, what he calls, the "cat move."

"Now, remember you have accepted that you might get injured. You might break a nail, or a hand, or a finger," Horner said. "You've already accepted that because you're not going to be a victim. The cat move is an explosion of energy into his eyes while you're screaming and you're thrusting with all your energy into his eyes."

As the women in our group practice the move, many of them are surprised at how squeamish they are, and how uncomfortable it is to think about hurting someone, even if his intent is to hurt them.

"I want you to get that out of your system right now, so if it ever really happens you have no compunction about doing what you have to do," Horner said sternly.

If it's too late to take an attacker by surprise and he has you, he tells women to then try to find the ears. "That's why I say find the ears, because in the middle of all this flailing it's hard to find anything, so just reach up and grab my ears, and they're like two handles, and then all you have to do is just scrape his eyes and he gets away."

And if your attacker grabs you from behind, Horner advises women to stop supporting their own weight by continually lifting their legs off the ground.

"To isolate you, they have to move you. Usually women struggle like crazy with their upper bodies, but they support themselves with their legs. That's the key to this whole thing," he added. "What you're trying to do is wear me out and get me to tip forward. I get to a point where I'm saying this just isn't working. I was looking for someone I could control, I was looking for a victim and you are not behaving that way."

That is, perhaps, Horner's biggest message - an attacker is looking for an easy target. Al says make the choice that it will not be you.

Carrie Donovan, whose story inspired Horner to write a book titled "Not Me!" will be forever grateful to him that he taught her to make that choice. Her left hand is permanently injured. But those scars, she said, are small compared to what could have happened.

"People go 'how are you doing do, you have nightmares?' And I go, 'no I don't, because I did what I had to do.' I'm so proud of myself that I could do that and I think any woman could do it. You can. You have to do something you can't just sit there and let yourself be taken advantage of," said Donovan.

For more information on Al Horner's book, "Not Me!", click here.